They’re imprisoned here in the pages of magazines:
The hipsters of the northern hemisphere; interrogators of underground; journos of trend extracting the truth from plaid skirts and cashmere scarfs. Open the magazines and they’ll escape onto Long Street; you’ll pass them on the way, through this portal to the icy cool of the North.
It’s the only respite from the heat. The retro fans in Yours Truly won’t cool you, but the magazines will. At this time of year they’re all ski slopes and Scandinavian moods – things that have nothing to do with Africa, but that’s the point. Sheer escapism. No Cape Times or M&G here. Don’t bring your own, and leave the Cosmo at the hairdresser and the GQ in the loo.
It beats reading up on Mangaung and Malema or looking at the tits of Twighlight’s teen queen. Dive into a Monocle report on Sweden’s island archipelago and, when you’re tired of reading, the clothes-horses of the catwalk are spread across other rags as thick as telephone directories.
And the coffee? It’ll turn your Swedish archipelago into a kaleidoscopic adventure. Deluxe Coffee Works supplies the beans – one sip and the bright red of Vida takes on a new meaning: ONLY IN EMERGENCIES.
Of course you’ll want a first class seat for your journey: the barbershop chair with a grand view of the street, and when you’re not reading up on Europe it’s the ideal spot for reading people, yet you’re still in Europe, the summer version, people sporting fashion let loose from the very same magazines.
And those are the locals. Seduced by funky Afro vibes or neo colonial bush forays, a few foreigners have travelled here via another magazine portal and dressed accordingly. Sunburned blondes sport plaited hair and well-heeled men imitate Hemingway’s kakhi forays into big game hunting – only the targets are on their backs. It mucks with your mind, this upside down world, and you wonder how strong the coffee really is.
So you blink, remember you’re in Africa, and realise it took a foreigner to remind you.
Yours Truly sells coffee, gourmet sandwiches and art.
175 Long Street, Cape Town
Tel 021-422-3788
